My last Parenting Pathway, discussed defining your parental vision or who it is you want to be as a parent. This week we’re going to talk about obstacles to that vision.
For one thing, it’s easy for your vision to be clouded and contaminated with the expectations of others. Ask yourself, for example, does your vision contain aspects of who it is your mother thinks you should be as a parent, your neighbor, your in-laws, etc. Remember, this is your vision and in order for it to be fulfilling for you, it must come from your heart.
Once you are clear about your vision, you are ready to begin to look at what else might get in the way of you becoming the parent you envision. This is a two step process. The first step is to identify the obstacles. The second step is to identify your values and put them to work for you.
Stop and think for a moment about those times when your children are really trying your patience. These might be times that get in the way of you fulfilling your parental vision. It is during these times that you can remind yourself of why becoming the parent you envision is important. Battle your obstacles with your values.
Values are those things that are most important for you to have in your life. Values get you up out of bed in the morning and bring strong feelings of fulfillment. Ask yourself, why is your vision compelling? The bottom line is to formulate a plan where the pros (values) of moving toward your vision outweigh the cons (obstacles).
Coaching Challenge: This week, I invite you to make a list of the obstacles that move into the path of your vision. Then make a list of those things that are important to you about your vision (values). Next to each obstacle, use your values to formulate the steps you will take to overcome the obstacle.
