Helping to build our child’s self-esteem is one of our most precious responsibilities as a parent. It requires tenderness, love, and cautiousness in our parental words and actions. The minds and hearts of children are grown and molded by our every word and action, thus impacting a child’s self-esteem.
Part of helping a child build his or her self-esteem includes expressing affection and celebrating a child’s act of sharing who they are. One of my favorite books, Self-Esteem Games, by Barbara Sher, illustrates an activity I often take part in with my children. This activity is called, “I like you.” I am fond of this activity because it enables the act of sharing your feelings and affections as a parent to be a reflective and unique experience. Some parents find it hard, at times, to share their deepest feelings and affections with their children. However, this activity makes it easy.
This is how it works. When your young child is sleeping and you check in on him or her at night, take a moment to look at her tender face and listen to his breath. Embrace the moment, as you watch her sleeping peacefully. Then bend down to his bedside and whisper all that is in your heart. Tell her who she is to you and share how much you like him. Simply express what is in your heart as you gaze upon his or her face. Keep it short, simple, and sweet, so as to not wake your child from a peaceful sleep. Doing this at night can set the tone and have a powerful influence throughout the day.
Coaching Inquiries: How do I express my affection with my children? In what ways can I encourage my children to express their affection? What are the most fulfilling moments I have with my children and how can I embrace more of them?
