Stillness–.quiet–.simply observing–.watching every movement–.every facial expression–. the body language–.taking in every sound–.watching them breathe–.putting yourself in their shoes to experience their every movement and feeling–.clearing your mind from anything and everything except one of the most important people in your life––your child.
How many times a day do you engage in this type of “being in the moment” exercise when in the presence of your children? Most parents would say rarely if ever. Many of us lead busy lives filled with “to do” lists and packed schedules that would rarely permit time for an activity like “being in the moment.” Regardless of how busy you are, I encourage you to find a way to make it a habit.
Fully “being in the moment” is one of the most difficult exercises for a parent, but it is also one of the most fulfilling.
I take my children to gymnastic lessons on Thursday mornings and most of the parents stay to “observe” the lesson. Many of the parents watching are multi-tasking: reading a magazine, talking with a friend, answering their cell phones, grading papers, etc. Even among those parents who are intently watching their child, the majority are not fully present in the moment. Their minds are filled with the places they need to go and the things they need to do that day.
Here is how “being in the moment” with your child can work for you:
- First reduce and/or eliminate any possibility for interruption (i.e. turn the TV off, take the phone off of the hook, etc.).
- Then begin by paying close attention to your breathing. Fill your lungs, then ring them out.
- Free your mind of everything except what your senses and intuition are feeding you about your child at that very moment. Note: this is WORK!
- Gently guide your inner voice to only focus on your child.
- Mentally put yourself in your child’s shoes and experience their every movement.
- Sit back, relax, breathe, and simply intently watch the movements, body language, facial expressions, interactions, and listen to their words and sounds, etc.
- You’ll know when you are fully in the moment because you will begin to feel the moment in your own body.
I invite you to begin to be fully in the moment with your children everyday many times a day this week. The reward is greatly fulfilling and you will begin to get to know your child in ways you never dreamed possible!
Coaching Inquiries: How often am I in the moment with my children? What am I missing out on by not being in the moment with my children? What is the gift for me in being in the moment? How can I begin to make a habit of being in the moment with my children?
